23

Post 23:

1) I saw an advertisement for Bacon Chili Cheeseburger Pizza. I have no idea what that would look or taste like. Also, I am proud of that.

2) I returned Ray Charles' Genius Loves Company (naturally it is what I checked out from the library) but I forgot to put the CD back in the case. I have a $19 fine. But it's ok because I just have to give it back.
Look it's been 23 days. I am straining at gnats here to find interesting tidbits.

3) Ha ha. A guy called today asking if his friend has a ticket. I said "I don't know. Maybe she does." He says she blacked out because she was so drunk but she thinks she remembers getting a ticket from a police officer. I laughed and said that maybe she should call the police. It is a funny thought.
One woman called once to ask if she got a ticket last week. I told her I didn't know. She said "Well, I know I did, but I threw it away." Ha!

4) A young lady called last week to see if her cousin and uncle were in our jail. I looked up the names and told her they weren't. She said "Oh. Ok, well, do you know the numbers for any other jails in Nebraska?"
I told her that each county has a jail and there are 93 counties in Nebraska. She asked if I knew them. I was speechless for a little bit and then told her that maybe she should check wikipedia or google. She thought that was a good idea and thanked me.

5) I have never liked football or basketball. It is my dark secret. I have never watched a full basketball or football game. I watched a full professional baseball game once, but only to say I had. It was excruciating. Being in Nebraska, I am presumed a Husker fan until proven otherwise, so I have had to fake a lot of football knowledge:
Person: "So did you see that game?"
Me: "Hoo-boy... really something, huh?"
Person: "What did you think of the defense?"
Me (not knowing whose defense person was referring to, much less whether it was good or bad): "Man, oh man. Pretty crazy stuff..."
Person: "Yeah, we really got crushed this time, but there's no way Pelini is going to let them rest before the next game. He doesn't let our boys get off easy after a performance like that...blah blah double yardage down and 10-4 good buddy field goal..."

Then I use the comments from Person to use when deflecting Person2's small talk:
Person2: "Some game, huh?"
Me: "Oh man, no way is Pelini going to let the defense rest after a performance like that, huh?"
Person2: "I accept you as a fellow fan."

But it is all a ruse to avoid explaining that I like athletics and I even enjoy playing some (SOME) team sports sometimes but I just think they are so boring.

I went and watched a BYU football game once. I left during halftime and went back to my dorm and played Grand Theft Auto and ate a hotpocket. My day improved considerably. Even when I worked for BYU event staff and got to watch the games for free, I just got so bored. I would stomp my feet and do the "gooooooo Cougars" bit, but I was miserable.

Do you have to feign interest in something because it is easier than explaining the truth?