5 things today

1) Lawyers can come and visit their clients in jail everytime whenever they want(2:01). Most of them know what they are doing and go and do whatever it is they do without bothering me. Some of them come in and ask me questions that make me weep for their clients. I had an attorney ask me what day it was, what the charges for her client were, and then the court dates. And then which day the date fell on. And then how many days away that was. I am not even kidding. I am pretty sure that every client I have seen her work with has been deported.
Another guy came in today to ask me if his client (who he was just in court with) was in or out of jail. And then he asked me how to file an appeal and how to get a Spanish appeal. I told him maybe he should go to the court and ask them. He asked if I had a paper in Spanish to file an appeal. I said I did not have one. I recognized this lawyer because twice before (twice!) he asked if he could leave his duffel bag (!?) in the lobby because he couldn't get a locker key because the only ID he carries on him is his passport (!?). Same duffel bag both times and same excuse about the passport.

2) I love my job partly because I am grossly overqualified. I have been a superstar all this year because I am overqualified for everything I could get hired for. I have loaded boxes in trucks, picked up construction trash, sprayed out filthy recycling bins, folded t-shirts, and now I talk on the phone. It is nice to know that you are going to exceed everyone's expectations because you know how to pay attention for longer than 15 minutes at a time and aren't going to try and steal the hand soap dispenser. But if I have to do this much longer I am going to rip my eyebrows off.

3) Any way you think about it, the universe is weird. It either had a beginning or it has existed forever. Either option is fantastic and sounds made up. I just started a new audiobook. I finished another Nero Wolfe and started listening to A Brief History of Time.

4) Since I have been at the jail, three people on separate occasions have gone to support a friend/son/husband in court. You have to show an ID to get into the courthouse. These three didn't realize that your ID is checked against a list of warrants and were arrested in the courtroom and brought straight to the jail. Ha!

5) I rode home today and it was raining just lightly enough that it was more of a coarse wet fog. In glasses, this would have been unbearable. Thanks to my February LASIK, I was great. I did notice that the same effect happened on my eyes. The drops would hit my eyes and I would have blurry patches where the rain would drip down my cornea. But then I would blink and it would be normal again. I tried to keep my eyes open to see how blurry my eyes would get in the rain but they got too dried out with my riding my bike and all. I'll have to try walking and not blinking. I wonder if our eyelids would atrophy if our heads were permanently in a saline solution. Or maybe just fill up some goggles. You could totally win any blinking contest. I really want to try this now. Bryan, you'll try it too, huh? I know this sounds cool to you.